Juilliard or Else Page 16

  "I was showering." My face flamed up as the words came out. I heard Tucker groan and shift in what sounded like a leather chair.

  "Was showering?" he softly asked me.

  "I was in the shower when I heard your ringtone." I giggled.

  "So, you're like…" he cleared his voice, "in a towel?"

  Oh. My. Goodness.

  Did I tell him yes? Did I tell him no? A part of me was saying, "Yes, tell him you're covered up." But the other part wanted to play along with him. I wanted to tell him no to hear his reaction. I went for the plunge.

  Taking a deep breath through my nose, I said, "No, not in a towel." I slammed my eyes shut so tight, thinking they would burst and my tiny veins and my eyes would bleed out.

  "Gabs," Tucker growled so deep. My chills gave me stomach jitters as my head dropped on my arm, too embarrassed to say anything to him.

  Even though I spent the night in Tucker's arms on another tiny couch, I wanted to be near him.

  Tucker cleared his voice some more before he started speaking, "I was wondering if I could come over later and take you out to dinner. Then maybe, we could watch a movie?"

  My heart leaped with joy. "Like a date?" I was trying really hard not to screech it out like a love struck teenager. I couldn't help it if I did, though. I was excited that he even wanted to see me again. My smile was starting to hurt my cheeks and my lip was going numb from chewing on it so hard.

  "Yes, a date."

  I started nodding my head as if Tucker were here watching me. "I would love to."

  He let a rush of air, "Great. I'll pick you up at fiveish?"

  I looked at my clock to see that it was twelve thirty. I had a good five hours to get myself ready. I knew that for my first date, Rachel would be more than willing to help me get ready.

  "Sounds good."

  "See ya, Gabs."

  I hung up the phone without saying good-bye and dropped my head back down. Forgetting that I was still naked and on my stomach, I couldn't get the image of Tucker out of my head: his blue eyes, that one deep dimple, his hot hands as they roamed on my body. Gah, and his kisses, I couldn't even describe the most wonderful feelings I felt when his tongue would seductively stroke mine. Yes, he was the first guy I'd kissed, but it was amazing. All my crazy thoughts of him made my mind dizzy; I shut my eyes and quickly fell asleep.

  SMACK!

  "AAAAHHHH!" I screamed and grabbed my naked butt that was burning with hot flames. I quickly flipped over on my back.

  SMACK!

  "AAAAHHHH!" My hands came around to my front and cupped my exposed breasts, then listened to Jade and Rachel laugh their stupid heads off from their ruthless smacks on my naked body. I grabbed one end of my comforter and rolled myself up in it very tight.

  "Dude, did you just carpet roll in your blanket?" Jade snickered at me through her laughing breaths. I was able to get my hand loose enough to give her the finger at the top of my blanket.

  "Gabs," Rachel burst out as best as she could, stuttering as she tried to get her words out. "We just wanted to come tell you that…that…that Tucker is here and waiting for you in the living room."

  Oh crap.

  I sprang from my bed and planted my feet on the floor. Surprisingly, I didn't fall on my butt as I untangled my body from my comforter and rushed to our shared bathroom. Ugh, my hair. It wasn't cooperating with the brush since I fell asleep with it wet with Tucker on my mind. I went right to work on the rats nest, but finally accepted defeat and just pulled it back into the bun Jade hated at the base of my neck. Not having any time to mess with the makeup, I decided on a little mascara and some of Rachel's pink lip gloss, and then raced back into my room to find an outfit.

  Once I was dressed, I stopped; I didn't know if I should dress casually or dressy. But knowing Tucker, I went with casual. After pairing black skinny jeans with a gray sweater, I also pulled on my black knee-length boots.

  My heels clicked on the hardwood floor. Rachel smiled at my appearance, Jade rolled her eyes, and Tucker's back was facing me. He slowly turned and met my gaze, his side smile showing his deep dimple. He fully turned and my face dropped: he was wearing a black dress jacket and a black button down shirt with a silver tie. He dressed up. He even had his usually messy hair slicked back and away from his eyes. He looked down to my toes and back up; I'm sure he was taking in my casual outfit.

  "Ah, shit," he quietly said, then loosened his tie at the knot.

  Jade smacked him on the shoulder. "That a boy, Tuck; you looked like shit anyway."

  I giggled and Tucker tossed his tie at me, hitting me in the face. I put it on just as a joke, but that didn't stop Tucker from taking my hand and pulling me to the front door and out the apartment. We stood waiting for the elevator and Tucker placed his hand on my lower back to usher me inside. The heat from his hand was still hot through my jacket and I shuddered.

  "You cold?"

  I shook my head. My body felt the complete opposite. I was warm, too warm. I wanted his arms around my waist, his lips on my skin, and his body pressed against mine. The thoughts entered my mind at a sudden rush, I wanted more. Tucker knew how to kiss and I wanted more. I peeked over at him and he looked down at me; I bit my bottom lip and stared back.

  "Gabs." He stepped closer to me and I turned my body to face him. One of his hands rested on my hip, and his other hand moved up to tug on his tie that was still around my neck. I pushed up on my toes and our lips met. That instant shock happened as our lips molded together as our tongues caressed in a long lasting kiss that I felt all the way to my toes. The electricity that I looked forward to every time Tucker was near my body – that feeling was happening right now, and I loved every minute of it.

  Tucker broke the magical kiss that was racing through my hot veins. "Mmm…You taste pretty good," he growled against my mouth and I instantly melted all over again. I couldn't help myself as I pushed up against his body to kiss him one more time. I really didn't care if anyone else got on the elevator with us. I just didn't want to stop kissing him.

  The cab stopped out front of a fancy restaurant that I had been to multiple times with my dad and Carol. Actually, it was Carol's favorite French restaurant.

  Tucker stopped us from walking into the restaurant, taking my hand in his. "I wanted to take you somewhere special." he mumbled out, looking at our intertwined fingers.

  "Hey, it's the thought that counts, right?" He met my eyes and nodded.

  "Yeah, but you're probably used to things like this, though?" He was right; I was. We came here about every other weekend. The staff even knew Carol's favorite table and said hi to us by name.

  I pressed up close to him. "Let's go get a hotdog and coke. We'll sit somewhere. That would mean more to me than a fancy restaurant."

  Bringing our hands up and he pecked my knuckles. "Are you just saying that, Gabs?"

  "No. That would make me happier." I smiled.

  We walked to a vendor just down the street and sat on the steps of the New York Public Library. I loved the library; I just loved to sit down to read a classic book by Jane Austen. But it had been so long since I even picked up a book. Our hands still locked onto one another as we ate the hotdogs and sipped on our drinks in silence.

  "Tell me more about yourself," I asked when I was done eating.

  "Not much left to tell," he said, taking another bite of his remaining hotdog.

  I nudged his shoulder with mine. "Come on, tell me something."

  "Um." Tucker sat there and thought about it. "I really don't have much."

  "Let's start easy then." I brushed bread crumbs off my jeans. "What's your favorite color?"

  Tucker tossed his head back and laughed, "Really, that's what you want to ask me? I thought you would dig deeper than that."

  "I don't want to make you feel uncomfortable. I just thought it was a start, and then we can move up or something." I felt stupid for asking that silly first grader question, but I couldn't think of anything.

  "Black," he
answered.

  "Black?"

  He nodded.

  "Why?" I asked.

  "Black has so many levels of color."

  "But it's black, just black."

  "You would think that, but I see it differently. When I sketch, I use pencil. You would think pencil has one color, but it doesn't. You can smooth it out, shade it, push lightly, and push hard so you have different shades. Black isn't like that. When I tattoo, black is the hardest color to work with, you gotta get it right or you're doomed."

  Wow. I really didn't think about it like that.

  "I just really enjoy drawing, always have. Becoming a tattoo artist is awesome. I already have some promising clients."

  "That's great, Tucker." I took another sip of my drink and stretched out my legs. My butt was going numb from sitting on the cement steps.

  "Do you want to come back to my place?" Tucker eyed me with a smirk. "Or we can go to yours," I threw in, mostly because I didn't want to force him to come to mine, but wanted to give him an option that we could go to his place instead.

  "No, I don't want to go to my place. My neighborhood is dangerous; I've told you that, Gabs. You can never go there."

  I peeked up at him under my lashes. "Even if you're with me?"

  "Especially if you're with me." He took my hand and turned it over to place a small kiss on my wrist.

  Why did he word it like that? I wanted to ask, but Tucker continued on.

  "I know that doesn't makes sense, but one day, I hope I get to tell you." Tucker stood and took my hand to pull me up and we started walking back in the direction of my apartment.

  "What about you, what's your favorite color?"

  I laughed with him. "If I had to choose, pink."

  "Now, why pink."

  "Cuz it's cute." Tucker laughed some more. "What about a favorite food?" I asked.

  "Hmm, food." He thought for a moment, "Pizza. It's super easy and really good."

  Now it was my turn to laugh, "What about you, Gabs?"

  How could I forget my favorite food? It was from when I was little, but that didn't really matter.

  "Macaroni and cheese with cut up hotdogs." I smiled proudly. "Oh, and you can't forget the glass of chocolate milk."

  Tucker scrunched up his nose and shook his head. "That sounds disgusting."

  "Nope. So good, you're missing out." I poked him in his chest and he grabbed my sides hard, then I started laughing and he ended up tickling me some.

  When we walked back into my building, Tucker suddenly went stiff at my side. He quickly pulled me into a darkened corner and covered my mouth with his hand.

  "Shh. Just be quiet, don't talk and stay here, okay?"

  I nodded. Suddenly I was scared and started to shake. What was going on? Tucker took his hand away from my mouth, softly pecking my lips and walked back out into the foyer of the building. Over by Michael was the African American guy from the coffee shop and club, dressed completely in black again with a gold chain glistening on his shirt. My eyes watched Tucker approach him with caution.

  "Jeremiah, man. What's up?" Tucker did that hand shake with him and they huddled together talking.

  "Where's that girl you've been hanging around with these days? You've never been a one woman man, Tuck. What's going on?" Jeremiah stood straight and stuffed his hands deep into his dress slacks. Tucker's eyes met mine from across the room and he shook his head. I thought maybe he was talking to me and telling me to stay still like he warned. But then I saw Jeremiah was leaning in, whispering in his ear. There was more whispering and more Tucker shaking his head, and then Jeremiah stepped away from him and walked to the front doors. But when he saw that Tucker wasn't behind him and was just staring at me, Jeremiah barked an order at him.

  "Now, Tucker!"

  Tucker's eyes didn't leave mine as he walked over to where Jeremiah was standing, then left the building with him.

  I didn't hear from Tucker the rest of the week. I didn't know where he went or what he did. When I asked Jett if Tucker was at the tattoo shop working, he would just shake his head at me.

  "Jett, should I be worried?" I asked one night as the three of us were outside on the balcony smoking.

  "Just leave it alone, Gabs. You'll hear from him when he's ready."

  More weeks went by and still nothing. Every time I made eye contact with Jasmine, she would just smirk at me. I still wondered where he was. The thought crossed my mind if Jeremiah said something to him to leave me alone.

  One day after school, Jade, Rachel, and I were walking home and when we rounded the corner to our building, I was shocked to see Tucker leaning up against my building. I slowly approached him while Jade and Rachel went inside. My doorman, Michael, watched us from a distance. I didn't know what to say to him, so I just walked by. However, he did follow me into the building and into the elevator, up to my floor and out on our balcony.

  I was sitting on the seat, pulling out a cigarette then handing the box over to Tucker. He flicked up a lighter and leaned to light mine, then his. Silence was the inbetweenie now. I kept my eyes moving around, trying not to let them land on Tucker's cute face. If they did, I was gonna end up back at square one. I was going to hold my ground this time.

  "Gabs, I'm sorry I just left you like that."

  I flicked the ashes off the stick while blowing smoke out at the same time as Tucker.

  "Where have you been?" I kept my eyes downcast as I asked him.

  "I can't tell you."

  I snorted. Of course he couldn't tell me; that's what was so frustrating. One question that I was afraid to ask was if he was with her. By her, I meant Jasmine. Ugh, even her name irritated me.

  I shut my eyes and braced myself for the answer I was going to at least get from this one question. "Were you with Jasmine?"

  Flicking his cigarette over the rail, he then knelt down in front of me. Taking my hands in his, he said, "Gabs, look at me."

  I had a hard time meeting his eyes, afraid he would tell me that he was with her and he didn't want to see me anymore. Just the little thought of that made my eyes sting and almost water down my cheeks. I took another drag and tipped my head up, careful not to blow smoke in his face. When I met his eyes, I really wanted to cry. His baby blues looked so sad. I really wanted to cry just from staring at him. He slowly reached up to stroke my cheek with the tip of his fingers.

  "I want to tell you, but I can't. I hope you can understand that much. How do you know her anyway?"

  My legs started to bounce with irritation. "She's in my ballet class at Juilliard. Told me one day to tell you hey. So Jasmine says 'hey'. Did you used to date her?"

  "What? No." Tucker shook his head, making his hair fall in his eyes. But just like always, he raked his hand through it in a wild sexy mess.

  I shook my head. "I don't understand. Is it me, Tuck? Am I pushing you away? I'm sorry that I've never had a boyfriend, that I'm a virgin. I grew up in a strict house with Carol and no friends. So I don't understand what you do when you're gone all the time. I'm sorry, but I don't understand why you keep going away."

  "Boyfriend?" he asked and I looked into his eyes.

  "Sorry, I didn't mean it like that. I meant guy, I've never had a guy friend like you. Crap. I'm sorry, just forget the whole thing." I bit my lower lip.

  Stroking my cheek, he said, "Gabs, I just can't tell you right now is all. Maybe one day, okay? But not now. I really need you to trust me, though. Please?" His hand was so soft up on my face, tenderly dragging his fingers down to my lips.

  "You're so beautiful. I've missed you, Gabs."

  And then he kissed me. My inner self was still so confused.

  Before I knew it, a month passed. Madame Ava was hitting us hard every day with the performance of Swan Lake. The auditions were tomorrow night and it was down to four girls—Jasmine, me, Sadie, and Mary—for the main role of Odette/Odile. Everyone was required to be there, but Madame Ava had a meeting with us to let us know that the bar was set high and that we are
each other's competition. I didn't know the other two girls, as they came from different classes. Jasmine was still being a crap head to me every time we were alone together. She did stupid crap to me, too. Just the other day as I was walking to get my gym bag, she stuck her stupid slipper covered foot out in front of me, and I fell on my face. Everyone laughed and Jon was the only one who came to help me up.

  I hung out with Tucker most days after class; he would pick me up right outside the school, and we would either go out for coffee at the little shop where we first met and play a couple of rounds of pool, or go to my apartment. When we would end up at my place, I had to admit, it was my favorite time with him.

  And we would always end up on the couch, with Tucker between my legs, making out like crazy. I couldn't get enough of him and every day that I was with him, I wanted more and more. Today was one of those days. Tucker picked me up from Juilliard and we walked home hand in hand. The kissing started really fast, his hands roamed up and down my sides, barely touching underneath my breast. Every time he got closer, the more I moaned into his mouth. My body was getting greedy with want and need from him.

  Tucker walked me backwards to the couch, but I wanted him in my bed. I had a hold of his face and pulled him back down the hallway and we stumbled into my room. This was it, I couldn't handle it anymore. I wanted him. My hands were going crazy in his hair as I pushed my tongue in and out of his mouth. I really didn't know what I was doing, but I knew he wanted me just as bad. His hands gripped my shirt while his fingertips grazed my hot skin as we tumbled on my bed. I pushed up on my elbows to the top of my bed while Tucker followed my lead and was between my legs.

  My mind kept screaming at me, Too many clothes! Too many clothes! I wanted to strip him down to nothing; I wanted to feel his hot flushed body up against mine so bad, and I couldn't wait.

  I was barely able to say his name, but it came out more like a moan. "Tucker…" His hands were under my shirt, making their way up to cup my breasts. I cried out at the sensation and the pleasure shooting through my stomach and between my legs. I arched my hips up, needing him.